They say people are their most unmasked, vulnerable, honest, and real versions around 3:00 am. I have always wondered why it was so.
Maybe it’s because at that time, the mind is away from clutter and distractions. You feel lighter, liberated, and in that moment, you don’t let the worries of tomorrow get to you. You don’t care if you get sloppy or unreasonable. In that moment, you’re not pretending. In that moment, you’re your realest self.
But then morning comes, and it’s like you’re caged with opinions again.
There’s always someone who makes this version of us emerge. There’s always someone we can be our 3:00 am version with, unapologetically. But then morning comes, and with it come all the apprehensions.
Okay, now hear me out. Has anyone ever brought out your 3:00 am version even in the pm? That’s rare. Very rare. Around more than a year back, I met someone who I experienced this with. There’s nothing here to go ‘aww’ for. If anything, it’s terrifying! It’s terrifying because you slowly realize that this person might see the side of yours that you have always intended to keep hidden!
I don’t know about you, but my 3:00 am version tends to get rather mawkish. That’s the only reason why we build the walls around ourself in the first place. To keep the Pandora’s box shut.
I tried my hardest to impede this exact situation. But this person, he broke down all my walls, and I never even heard the bricks fall. Rather, he picked and gathered all the bits, stood right beside me and helped me build up stronger walls instead. Naturally, I was afraid. Afraid to let my guard down, afraid of what he might think. Afraid of all this being ‘too good to be true’. But for the first time in forever, I felt free. And all those little apprehensions gradually started floating away.
I’ve been rambling on for a while, not sure if I’m spiraling. Not even sure if I’m the only one who’s ever felt all this. Not sure if you understand me completely. But one thing that I’m sure of is, if you find someone who brings out the 3:00 am version of you, howsoever it may be, makes it stay round the clock instead of just after midnight, and chooses to choose you even after seeing it, that’s love. Pure, unpretentious love.
Don’t let go of it. I know I won’t :)